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I gained a testimony of the church I had belonged to for some time, but never truly understood. More than that, I learned what it truly was to use Christ’s Atonement. I also was directed to emotional support. Which led me to the Cahtah Haht Shirt therapist who said, ‘You accept the love you think you deserve.’ Although at the time when she said it, I didn’t think too much of it. But after the divorce was final in 2013 it came back to my mind. ‘You accept the love you think you deserve.’ I ultimately knew I didn’t want to accept a.
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Love like this again. I had accepted this kind of love since I was 15, and I needed to stop the cycle. So I set on a journey to change my habits, and I discovered my beliefs. I didn’t consciously know it, but I was trying to appease my two beliefs of worth and love. Keep status and have a partner. No matter what. I didn’t look too hard at the Cahtah Haht Shirt signs around me. Like that I was possibly entering into a marriage too young, or marrying someone who wasn’t going to treat me with love and respect, or marrying someone who still.
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Didn’t know who he was and what he wanted in life. Because I had my value based on another human, I didn’t value myself. I didn’t realize that our value and love has to come from within first. I didn’t love myself enough to watch for signs in relationships or remove myself from these abusive circumstances. I didn’t know I needed to. I didn’t know what to look for. I didn’t know I had to build a foundation of love for myself first. Once I started on this journey for myself, I quickly realized I wasn’t the Cahtah Haht Shirt only one.
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That didn’t know this. That this was a common trend for others who had been in less than acceptable relationships. So that’s why my business partner, Tiﬀany Denny and I joined forces to start The Relationship Recovery in 2016. Tiﬀany was passionate about helping people immediately after a divorce or a relationship had ended from abuse. I was passionate about helping them figure out how they ended up in the Cahtah Haht Shirt relationship, and how to prevent them from ending up in the same relationship with a diﬀerent partner again.