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I had just spent the last 2 days cleaning up vomit, I was pulling around the clock laundry service, and helping Aaron move from the recliner to the Hocus Pocus wine helps me focus Halloween shirt, to the coach, to the bathroom, then back to the recliner and so on.
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So, when he asked me to sit with him my response was, ‘I don’t have time to sit.’ The sheets on our bed need to be changed, the bathroom needs to be cleaned, and Maddie hasn’t been bathed in probably 2 weeks. He responded, ‘Robin please come sit with me. Right now, I feel pretty decent. The other things can wait. Just stop for a minute.’ You would think that after that response I would stop and sit with him. I didn’t. I responded, let me clean the bathroom and change the sheets and then I’ll come to sit. When I was finished and made my way back to where Aaron was laying, he had fallen asleep. And at that moment, I sighed with relief because I still needed to do 80 billion loads of laundry, the dishes, and feed my children some sort of meal.
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Then I had a moment with Aaron’s oncologist. Aaron had stepped out of the room to use the bathroom and for the first time throughout our cancer journey, I saw real concern in his doctor’s eyes. Sadly, I know I wasn’t the Hocus Pocus wine helps me focus Halloween shirt wife or husband he had shown those same eyes, but I remember feeling like I was the only one ever in the world that would see them. MY husband was going to die. I don’t remember everything he said to me that day because realizing that Aaron would die was the pretty distracting understatement of the century.