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I was basically a tween. ‘You have to do it,’ Lolly and my best friend Ben both said when I waffled in terror after awkwardly the Rugby Ball Santa Diamond Christmas Sweater setting up my first date. ‘You have to go out with him. It’s just a lunch date.’ It had only been a week or two since Lolly and I had made our decision to split, and it all felt terribly rushed. I also knew how hard this must have been for Lolly who tells her part of this story here, and it made me profoundly hesitant. But they were persistent.
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‘If you are going to learn how to do this, you have to do it. You have to go on the date,’ they both urged. I decided to go for it. My first date, a few days later, was with a nice guy I’ll call Eliot. I got dressed and gave Lolly a hug as I walked out the Rugby Ball Santa Diamond Christmas Sweater door. She hugged me back with hurt and pain in her eyes. ‘Good luck,’ she said, and my heart broke for her pain. Yet I knew this is what she wanted for me, and for us. This first date guy, Eliot, and I had decided to.
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Meet up at a Thai restaurant that the last line of my profile in the pic above was a winner. I listened to 90’s rock all the way there, trying to get in touch with my teenage self. I was dating. I was finally doing the Rugby Ball Santa Diamond Christmas Sweater thing most people got to do decades earlier. I was doing the thing we are all meant to do. I was searching for a connection, attachment, and the fun of finding love. Half of me was terrified and broken-hearted. Another half of me was totally pumped. A particular.
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Song came on that reminded me of my teenage years Black Hole Sun, by Soundgarden and I could feel that part of myself the Rugby Ball Santa Diamond Christmas Sweater teenage part of me that needed to go through the basic process of sexual development, which I had squashed away and ignored and even hated for religious reasons for 37 years breathe a sigh of relief. Finally, he seemed to say. We’ve been waiting for this our whole life. And finally, you are being brave enough to do it. The date with Eliot was very nice.